Expressing love in silence is not a thing!

How seldom or frequently do you express your love to you partner or family?

You may think that whatever you do for your family and/or partner like earn money for them, give them a better lifestyle, care for them, protect them, try to understand their needs before they say it and fulfill it, plan a vacation for them, stay together with them, spend time with them, go to the hospital with them for their treatment if they are ill are all clear expression of your love for them. It seems more like fulfilling your responsibility rather than an expression of love.

You may think expressing your love to someone in words is awkward, or what is there to say as they might already know, why do you need to reiterate it every now and then as it won’t change love and affection you have for them.

Love always have a need to be expressed, it is not something you can expect from your loved one’s to understand through your actions or assume that they might already know. If you love someone wholeheartedly, you never fail to express it to them in every possible occasion you get, this way you make them realize and appreciate that you have them in their heart and still hold that importance in their life. They are the one you have in their heart that they cherish and you don’t shy away from admitting it to the world. This confession of love every now and then is a glue that holds the essence of your relationship and never lets it break or fade away.

I believe if you think you love someone maybe for years but you do anything less than making them feel special by expressing it frequently you tend to make them feel you no longer love them or cherish them the way you did before or they are just becoming a burden or responsibility to you, you start to drift apart and if this continues and if you do not act promptly you might realize that you are not able to fill in the rift that has formed in your relationship.

Isn’t this the main reason why most of the relationships that we think as our ideal that would last forever doesn’t even last till lifetime, this is because the relationship loses the essence of expression of love in it as both the party involved finds it awkward and unnecessary after staying together for decades if not years…

Appreciate and cherish the people that you love in your life and never put them in a tight spot in your relationship where they feel unwanted, unappreciated and lonely even though they have you.

Life must go on…

In life –

we all have an unspeakable secret that we want to take to our graves,

an irreversible regret that we never be able to make up for,

an unkept promise that might have hurt the person who loved and trusted you,

an unheard request that was obviously loud but you never tried to heat it out,

an irreplaceable loss that makes you feel empty in your heart even today no matter how much you try to keep yourselffrom hurting on thinkingabout it,

an unreachable dream which always inspired and motivated you to get up and work for it but not being able to become a reality has shattered you to the Core and added it in you list of regrets

and an unforgettable first love which might bringa smileonyourfaceeven todaywhen you think of it but it’s too good to be real.

Still life is being about happy anyhow because everything in life can be summed up in 4 words “life must goes on” no matter what.

Mid week pondering

Don’t let your bad days that you are facing trick you to believe that you have a bad life… its just a phase that is meant to pass as time and life goes on giving you abundant of experiences to learn and grow…

Comfort

Can you remember how you felt first time when you were left by you parents at your grandparent’s place or any friend’s or relative’s place. Well that can be boring if you don’t have friends around there but wonderful if you get all the attention from everyone since you are so small and cute or smart whatever!

Can you recollect how you felt on your first day of kindergarten, middleschool and high-school. Well well thats a bit scary leaving your parents for the first time sitting amidst other kids and teacher that might not be what you wanted it to be like.

Can you still remember the feeling you had when it was first day in college with no familiar faces around. Ofcourse there is a feeling of excitement if you tend to be an extrovert but here I am not mentioning this feeling. Think deeper.

Again can you remember when how you felt when you entered your office/workplace for the first time or when you actually switched your job recently. Yes it might have been a feeling of relief that you are employed now and can think of starting a new and supporting your family. Indeed what an inexplicable feeling that is! But here again I am not talking about this feeling either.

All these situations that I have mentioned above is where you all might have experienced a common feeling… I.e. lack of the feeling of comfort. I bet you might have experienced this in one or the other phase of beginning a new chapter in your life in various scales that may vary depending upon if you are an introvert or an extrovert.

Well we are always told to choose comfort over any other materialistic thing since it will give you peace, satisfaction which is what you need in the long run in your life. The real question here is how do you know if you are comfortable with a particular place or thing in your life to prioritize it over other things…

You might think at once and conclude that I have many friends there so I feel safe and comfort, while other might say they may have pleasant memories of this place or person that comforts them and make it define as comfort to them.That is ofcourse not that easy to figure out if you think carefully about it.

You become comfortable only when you face and be in that place for a while. You observe and try to understand people and places around, communicate with people around,

make up pros and con list in your mind about this place, make friends here and actually make efforts to belong here. This is unconscious efforts people make under their natural behavior to make themselves comfortable to that environment and train your mind believe that you are comfortable right here and you belong here.

The strange thing is that this comfort feeling doesn’t comes to you automatically…this never happens. You have to put some efforts knowingly or unknowingly to make it look like it.

The point I am trying to emphasize here is for you feeling of comfort begins only when you feel discomfort and you know how it feels like to be in discomfortable and make up your mind to change this feeling, failing to do which makes you wish you can run away from it.

Another amazing thing is that the feeling of comfort is so addictive that it makes you want to stick in and hold on to things that are no longer beneficial to your personal development but you still don’t want to give it up anyways since you’ve found warmth and comfort in it that you’ve been yearning for.

The efforts that we put between discomfort to comfort is what enables us to grow and develop in to a better version of ourselves.

It might be an easy for an extrovert to achieve this feeling in short time because of their jolly, friendly and bring it on kind of personality, but introverts do get a hard time getting acquainted to such situations. So comfort does not come to you inbuilt in your system for a person or a place when you are born or when you just step into a new environment, its what you inculcate, nurture and make up such a warm cocoon for yourself to be happy and make yourself believe that you belong here !

Well we can only say constants in life is only what is comforting to you…like your parents, siblings, friend or even you home at large where you’ve spent most of your happy times…

Wishful thinking

There comes a point in life where you feel cold deep inside your heart.
Some expectations that you’ve been nurturing like forever that you’ve not received however hard you’ve tried for it or even though you’ve secretly kept it in your prayers forever.
Its the thing you cannot give up hope for and deep down in your heart you’ve known the possibility of it not getting implemented ever. It occupies your heart little by little everyday and when you see it not happening inspite of all the efforts you’ve put in, these unfulfilled things start to freeze your heart making you incapable to feel the warmth even though you don’t intend to be this way. You can’t help it, you can’t stop yourself from feeling this way since its the thing that you’ve always wanted and prayed for and it has been occupying an inexplicable snd irreplaceable place in your heart. To deal with such shortcomings is not as easy as it may sound since its painful to peep in to this frozen part of your heart as it makes you think of how everyday you’ve wished to make it happen and how everyday at the end of the day you realize it won’t happen…
You feel cold just like being in a distant snowclad mountain having nobody around for you to get any warmth from. You desperately start to find ways to distract thyself from the pain of unfulfilled expectations but it working out for you is indeed a ‘wishful thinking’.
Everybody have such baggage hidden deep inside their heart and you can’t throw it away. It grows everyday and you tend to learn how to carry it with you each passing day and help yourself in future taking this baggage as a lesson and experience as to how you learnt to face it and carry it. Everyone has this cold place deep in their heart which they do not want to reveal to anyone fearing maybe judgment from others and the possibility that they might not understand why you can’t give up on it snd how important it is for you…
The way you learn to deal with these shortcomings and experiences in life is what decides how successful you become.
Existing isn’t difficult but learning to make each experience and lesson taken from various shortcomings in life is what give it a worth. You may not appreciate this but yes deep down you are still putting so much effort everyday to make it worth not knowing if would help you accomplish your purpose or not.
This effort that you put to tolerate this coldness in your heart is what makes you worth it, it makes you stronger and helps you turn shortcomings you faced in life into a precious memory and experience to treasure.

Thursday thoughts

Everytime you feel low rather than making yourself miserable thinking about things that’s bothering you, try to train your mind and develop a mindset where your mind becomes stronger than your emotions that’s been affecting you and your decisions greatly.

Otherwise you’ll endup losing your mind and yourself bit by bit everytime you give in to your emotions to lead your decisions.

Then when you’ll look back you’ll see that you’ve lost yourself in all this emotional chaos going on in your mind.

Keep calm and never give up on yourself!! You are worth being held up on!

Back to home thoughts

Today while I am sitting in the train by the window traveling back to home after a year almost for diwali few thoughts randomly hit me that generally I never get time to ponder on or think about…

This Covid-19 lockdown and WFH definitely tested me enough making me stay alone away from the family for almost a year and in such a way that I can’t feel the excitement of going home for Diwali at all that kept me lit up for many weeks before going back home… My mind is all filled with how to reach home safely since I am traveling through the train…

I was fine with staying away from home for Diwali till two weeks back and suddenly something changed. I felt the urge of going home, not wanting to experience staying alone on festival day thinking about all the good old years that I enjoyed with family in Diwali.

This is when some part of me started convincing me to go back home as it is not worth it to stay away from the family for any reason on the main festive season. I realized I deserve to feel happy and contented at this time of the year… Without allowing myself to have any second thoughts on this, I followed my heart booked the ticket and here I am writing this blog in the train.

I realized this part of me that convinced me to chuck everything and do what I want always pops up when the limit of tolerance is reached and something becomes unbearable to feel and survive it… This part of me is my personal favorite that never allows me to give up and directs me to a way that makes it easy to make up….

Back to home thoughts

Today while I am sitting in the train by the window traveling back to home after a year almost for diwali few thoughts randomly hit me that generally I never get time to ponder on or think about…

Back to home thoughts

Today while I am sitting in the train by the window traveling back to home after a year almost for diwali few thoughts randomly hit me that generally I never get time to ponder on or think about…

Thursday thoughts…05/11/2020

How hard have you found yourself pushing you to hang on and not let go…

You have your own little ways to inspire and motivate yourself every morning when you wake up.
You have your own little ways to inspire and motivate yourself every morning when you wake up.