Category: My thoughts in my words

August letter

Dear Folks,

I’ve learnt wonderful lessons while facing way to many ups and downs in life in last few years like-

You only tend to see what you want to see in the given situation. People can guide you, advice you as much as their heart desires but YOU are the one who you listen to so beware of what you think and convince yourself…

For everything you’ve lost, you have gained something. With every bad experiences you get lessons for life and with every good experience you create beautiful memories for life.

Love yourself no matter what others think of you, you were not born just to get approval from people telling you how to live and feel who themselves are never happy and satisfied in life. This is you own life and choices you make that makes you what you are, don’t let anyone’s judgement influence your happiness. When I look back I realize how much time I’ve wasted trying to become a person that fits in the frame of perfect girl who I was not happy being. Doing what you love to do and caring more about your thoughts and choice rather unnecessary validations from people around is liberating, it makes you believe that if you love yourself you won’t let yourself suffer because of others because it’s not worth losing your mind or yourself for…

Situation that break/shatter you completely making you believe nothing and doubt every believe that you have is what remoulds you into a strong and better person. This process of making and breaking is rule of the universe that can be seen everywhere, everyone…there is no exception to that. It’s your choice if you want to be shattered for life or build yourself again again with perseverance. Trust me when I say, this takes every ounce of efforts from your end to make up your mind and face all the situations heads on…

It’s true when people say that every situation that comes up in life is a phase that has to pass, nothing is constant neither pain, suffering nor happiness and peace. But it is up to you how you mould yourself for these situations and face it or just hide or avoid it. Well, former choice is the unsaid choice that you have to make eventually because you do realize once you grow up the you can’t always run or hide, you ought to settle and face what comes for you…its kind of the compulsory question that you have in an exam that is difficult but requires you to attempt to pass through…

I like pouring my thoughts into my blogs like this because I believe many people out there might find it difficult to handle themselves in weird situations life put you through and would like to know that they are not alone facing this. Sometimes its just enough to know that there are people around who are in difficult situations but choose to fight and face it. I do appreciate how similar the points that I mention here are to theirs through their comments on my blogs. Thanks you all for the love and support…

Kind Regards,

Ritika

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Self care…

What makes you believe someone who you think loves you actually does? Let’s frame it this way like what is your definition of love, if you are able to define what love means to you use that frame on people around you and the ones that fit in your love frame is whom you love. But how can you make a same Frame for others and guaze if you actually fit into their love frame…

Where there is affection there is love

Where there is genuine care and concern there is love

Where there is hope there is love

Where there is pain there is love

Where there is heartbreak there used to be love

Where there is a crush it might manifest into love

Where there is believe there is love

It’s difficult to understand if you can fit into the love frame of the person who fits in your frame but you do have a person for you who understands you in and out, who has been a witness to all your struggles, successes, failures, who guides your conscience to do what is right for you, you might not be present in front of you directly but you constantly talk to them and ask for their validation before making up your mind. You guessed it…its YOU.

You have validation for person whom you like and love but do you even consider yourself before them. You do fit in you love frame perfectly but you tend to believe you’ll find it outside which often leads to expectations and eventually disappointment. Why put yourself through so much? You are responsible for your own happiness and you are the one who is supposed to put efforts to achieve that. You can’t completely make your happiness others business and never goes as you think and you end up losing yourself in the process which is all you’ll always have no matter what you do. Don’t underestimate how lovely and beautiful you are inside out and you don’t people to love you to live but rather you need to put yourself first and care for your feelings.

Life must go on…

In life –

we all have an unspeakable secret that we want to take to our graves,

an irreversible regret that we never be able to make up for,

an unkept promise that might have hurt the person who loved and trusted you,

an unheard request that was obviously loud but you never tried to heat it out,

an irreplaceable loss that makes you feel empty in your heart even today no matter how much you try to keep yourselffrom hurting on thinkingabout it,

an unreachable dream which always inspired and motivated you to get up and work for it but not being able to become a reality has shattered you to the Core and added it in you list of regrets

and an unforgettable first love which might bringa smileonyourfaceeven todaywhen you think of it but it’s too good to be real.

Still life is being about happy anyhow because everything in life can be summed up in 4 words “life must goes on” no matter what.

Change…

“It is not the strongest of the species that
survives, not the most intelligent that survives. It’s the one that is the most adaptable to change.”
– Charles Darwin


Survival of the fittest. The phrase is best understood as, survival of the form that will leave the most copies of itself in successive generations. While physical fitness is an attribute of ‘fitness’, it is just one of many.
You must learn to adapt to change in order
to not only become successful in your life, but to survive.

Nothing good can come to you if refrain yourself from changing with the pace of the world. Ofcourse it’s difficult to motivate yourself, come out of your cozy comfort zone to pace up everytime with the Change but that’s what keeps you on your toes and helps you achieve better things in life that you want for yourself.

I think I learnt this lesson in a hard way in life through my past experiences but learning it hard way is what made it memorable and worth it. And if I would get a chance to go back in past I would not like to change any of it as I know what I was going through at that time and how I came out of it, changed myself completely in an attempt to become a better version of myself…

Let me make my mistakes and learn from it

Let me make my own series of mistakes to learn and grow through it… Life doesn’t come with a guide or manual so how can someone force you to believe what they say through their experience is right for me as well. We all have different ideas and prospective in life and just because I don’t agree with someone on a point doesn’t make me look stupid or rebel. Ofcourse I have my own thoughts that I have developed over years of my existence through my good and bad experiences that have shaped my personality the way it is today. It’s my choice to make to take or leave people’s suggestions based or their experience or make my own mistakes and learn from it, who knows if I don’t make a mistake instead find a better way out of it and teach these people this prospect that I have on it!
In today’s world no elder can impose their thoughts on their children or grandchildren but only suggest a way which they find better through their own past experiences. If you try to impose your thoughts on them surely you’ll drift yourself away from their heart as you seem to be controlling to them and surely nobody likes to be controlled against their will, isn’t it… Instead you can just share your experiences with them rather than making them believe and do what you want and maybe you giving them your experience will help them make better choices and love and respect you more dearly since they can see that you actually respect their thought as an individual and not always treat them as a kid when they are already grown up adults…
It’s a privilege to have a choice to make and learn from your mistakes and nobody can teach you better than your own personal experiences so never refrain to make a choice to choose a path and face whatever difficulties that may come your way because this process is what will take you long way and again practically speaking you can’t expect somebody to always be there to hold your hands and guide you throughout your life…

To put up with people that are insensitive…

There are times when you come across people who do not think before speaking in not a good way and you have no way to make them understand how rude and insensitive they can be to others and make them hear themselves when they speak.

It specifically becomes difficult if you have an emotional and sensitive approach to thinking and action to stand these kind of people around you and its inexplicable how difficult life becomes everyday if you happen to work and connect with these kind of people everyday as part of your job.

You start feeling exhausted in the morning thinking how to escape from these people and how to avoid getting hurt talking to them. On the other hand these kind of insensitive people have no clue how impossible they are to deal with and how ruthlessly they behave with others keeping a stand that they are straightforward.

Well everybody knows if a person is being straightforward or being rude just to showcase their power trying hard to mask their insecurities and inferiority complex. People who avoid talking or use ignorance as a medicine to deal with these people are knowingly or unknowingly feed their ego making them believe they have a right to be rude to supress other people and pave their way…

First thing to do if you have a misfortune to work with these kind of people only tolerate what you feel you can ignore but once it starts mentally affecting you stand up for yourself and speak up. Its not your weakness to be sensitive, rather its a virtue that makes you compassionate and makes you kind enough to empathize with people around you and indeed makes you a good person. Also its not that only people who are rude or insensitive are straightforward. Its a matter of person choice if you respect and be kind to everybody around you or not.

If things go beyond your control and it becomes intolerable to deal with such people just SPEAK UP…Since your silence would make your life difficult and also you would be forcing yourself into a toxic environment which might affect you physically and mentally as well. If you need to work with them everyday just make them realize how wrong they are thinking that you silence was because you were easy target to bully and it was testing your tolerance…You are responsible for your mental well-being so don’t let anybody invade and ruin your peace of mind because of their toxic and supressing attitude…

You need to be smart enough to not go down to their level to make them taste their own medicine but make them realize how wrongly they treat you with your goodness and kindness…

Don’t give people chance to make you live in a toxic environment amongst toxic people, you deserve better and you need to know that you really do.

Silence

Isn’t it ironical that if a person is close to you, their silence is loudest that they can speak to you. This is because silence is the language of your heart…

It speaks louder than anyone can hear without even a single word being uttered. If you feel a connection with a person you may actually understand many gestures of the person or rather you can infer the mood of that person without that person speaking it out to you in words. Well this isn’t a rocket science to understand, this connection or bonding comes from the trust, understanding and time that you’ve spent together which helped you understand that person so well that words no longer remains the only medium for you to communicate or understand what the other person is thinking or feeling… This heart to heart connection makes you understand each other better. Isn’t it amazing and worth appreciating that we people can share this kind of magical connection with each other…

Silence is sometimes like a cold winter night which makes you feel the cold and emptiness in your heart while sometimes it is what you need to be able to get your thoughts together and make a firm decision.

Saturday thoughts…

Certainty dwells in the uncertainty of one’s belief that every situation irrespective of whether good or bad and irrespective of whether you want it or not will also pass and things will eventually fall into place and make sense to you for good.

Ironically, you’ll always conveniently prefer to believe that life is uncertain rather believe in the fact that everything in life is meant to certainly happen when it’s meant to be.

Everyone have their own fate and destiny that will follow and it’s certain from the day you are born the only thing is that since you are part of it, it seems to be uncertain and you fail to see a bigger picture of what future might bring to you as reward of your patience.