Comfort

Can you remember how you felt first time when you were left by you parents at your grandparent’s place or any friend’s or relative’s place. Well that can be boring if you don’t have friends around there but wonderful if you get all the attention from everyone since you are so small and cute or smart whatever!

Can you recollect how you felt on your first day of kindergarten, middleschool and high-school. Well well thats a bit scary leaving your parents for the first time sitting amidst other kids and teacher that might not be what you wanted it to be like.

Can you still remember the feeling you had when it was first day in college with no familiar faces around. Ofcourse there is a feeling of excitement if you tend to be an extrovert but here I am not mentioning this feeling. Think deeper.

Again can you remember when how you felt when you entered your office/workplace for the first time or when you actually switched your job recently. Yes it might have been a feeling of relief that you are employed now and can think of starting a new and supporting your family. Indeed what an inexplicable feeling that is! But here again I am not talking about this feeling either.

All these situations that I have mentioned above is where you all might have experienced a common feeling… I.e. lack of the feeling of comfort. I bet you might have experienced this in one or the other phase of beginning a new chapter in your life in various scales that may vary depending upon if you are an introvert or an extrovert.

Well we are always told to choose comfort over any other materialistic thing since it will give you peace, satisfaction which is what you need in the long run in your life. The real question here is how do you know if you are comfortable with a particular place or thing in your life to prioritize it over other things…

You might think at once and conclude that I have many friends there so I feel safe and comfort, while other might say they may have pleasant memories of this place or person that comforts them and make it define as comfort to them.That is ofcourse not that easy to figure out if you think carefully about it.

You become comfortable only when you face and be in that place for a while. You observe and try to understand people and places around, communicate with people around,

make up pros and con list in your mind about this place, make friends here and actually make efforts to belong here. This is unconscious efforts people make under their natural behavior to make themselves comfortable to that environment and train your mind believe that you are comfortable right here and you belong here.

The strange thing is that this comfort feeling doesn’t comes to you automatically…this never happens. You have to put some efforts knowingly or unknowingly to make it look like it.

The point I am trying to emphasize here is for you feeling of comfort begins only when you feel discomfort and you know how it feels like to be in discomfortable and make up your mind to change this feeling, failing to do which makes you wish you can run away from it.

Another amazing thing is that the feeling of comfort is so addictive that it makes you want to stick in and hold on to things that are no longer beneficial to your personal development but you still don’t want to give it up anyways since you’ve found warmth and comfort in it that you’ve been yearning for.

The efforts that we put between discomfort to comfort is what enables us to grow and develop in to a better version of ourselves.

It might be an easy for an extrovert to achieve this feeling in short time because of their jolly, friendly and bring it on kind of personality, but introverts do get a hard time getting acquainted to such situations. So comfort does not come to you inbuilt in your system for a person or a place when you are born or when you just step into a new environment, its what you inculcate, nurture and make up such a warm cocoon for yourself to be happy and make yourself believe that you belong here !

Well we can only say constants in life is only what is comforting to you…like your parents, siblings, friend or even you home at large where you’ve spent most of your happy times…

Wishful thinking

There comes a point in life where you feel cold deep inside your heart.
Some expectations that you’ve been nurturing like forever that you’ve not received however hard you’ve tried for it or even though you’ve secretly kept it in your prayers forever.
Its the thing you cannot give up hope for and deep down in your heart you’ve known the possibility of it not getting implemented ever. It occupies your heart little by little everyday and when you see it not happening inspite of all the efforts you’ve put in, these unfulfilled things start to freeze your heart making you incapable to feel the warmth even though you don’t intend to be this way. You can’t help it, you can’t stop yourself from feeling this way since its the thing that you’ve always wanted and prayed for and it has been occupying an inexplicable snd irreplaceable place in your heart. To deal with such shortcomings is not as easy as it may sound since its painful to peep in to this frozen part of your heart as it makes you think of how everyday you’ve wished to make it happen and how everyday at the end of the day you realize it won’t happen…
You feel cold just like being in a distant snowclad mountain having nobody around for you to get any warmth from. You desperately start to find ways to distract thyself from the pain of unfulfilled expectations but it working out for you is indeed a ‘wishful thinking’.
Everybody have such baggage hidden deep inside their heart and you can’t throw it away. It grows everyday and you tend to learn how to carry it with you each passing day and help yourself in future taking this baggage as a lesson and experience as to how you learnt to face it and carry it. Everyone has this cold place deep in their heart which they do not want to reveal to anyone fearing maybe judgment from others and the possibility that they might not understand why you can’t give up on it snd how important it is for you…
The way you learn to deal with these shortcomings and experiences in life is what decides how successful you become.
Existing isn’t difficult but learning to make each experience and lesson taken from various shortcomings in life is what give it a worth. You may not appreciate this but yes deep down you are still putting so much effort everyday to make it worth not knowing if would help you accomplish your purpose or not.
This effort that you put to tolerate this coldness in your heart is what makes you worth it, it makes you stronger and helps you turn shortcomings you faced in life into a precious memory and experience to treasure.

Thursday thoughts

Everytime you feel low rather than making yourself miserable thinking about things that’s bothering you, try to train your mind and develop a mindset where your mind becomes stronger than your emotions that’s been affecting you and your decisions greatly.

Otherwise you’ll endup losing your mind and yourself bit by bit everytime you give in to your emotions to lead your decisions.

Then when you’ll look back you’ll see that you’ve lost yourself in all this emotional chaos going on in your mind.

Keep calm and never give up on yourself!! You are worth being held up on!

Back to home thoughts

Today while I am sitting in the train by the window traveling back to home after a year almost for diwali few thoughts randomly hit me that generally I never get time to ponder on or think about…

This Covid-19 lockdown and WFH definitely tested me enough making me stay alone away from the family for almost a year and in such a way that I can’t feel the excitement of going home for Diwali at all that kept me lit up for many weeks before going back home… My mind is all filled with how to reach home safely since I am traveling through the train…

I was fine with staying away from home for Diwali till two weeks back and suddenly something changed. I felt the urge of going home, not wanting to experience staying alone on festival day thinking about all the good old years that I enjoyed with family in Diwali.

This is when some part of me started convincing me to go back home as it is not worth it to stay away from the family for any reason on the main festive season. I realized I deserve to feel happy and contented at this time of the year… Without allowing myself to have any second thoughts on this, I followed my heart booked the ticket and here I am writing this blog in the train.

I realized this part of me that convinced me to chuck everything and do what I want always pops up when the limit of tolerance is reached and something becomes unbearable to feel and survive it… This part of me is my personal favorite that never allows me to give up and directs me to a way that makes it easy to make up….

Back to home thoughts

Today while I am sitting in the train by the window traveling back to home after a year almost for diwali few thoughts randomly hit me that generally I never get time to ponder on or think about…

This Covid-19 lockdown and WFH definitely tested me enough making me stay alone away from the family for almost a year and in such a way that I can’t feel the excitement of going home for Diwali at all that kept me lit up for many weeks before going back home… My mind is all filled with how to reach home safely since I am traveling through the train…

I was fine with staying away from home for Diwali till two weeks back and suddenly something changed. I felt the urge of going home, not wanting to experience staying alone on festival day thinking about all the good old years that I enjoyed with family in Diwali.

This is when some part of me started convincing me to go back home as it is not worth it to stay away from the family for any reason on the main festive season. I realized I deserve to feel happy and contented at this time of the year… Without allowing myself to have any second thoughts on this, I followed my heart booked the ticket and here I am writing this blog in the train.

I realized this part of me that convinced me to chuck everything and do what I want always pops up when the limit of tolerance is reached and something becomes unbearable to feel and survive it… This part of me is my personal favorite that never allows me to give up and directs me to a way that makes it easy to make up….

Back to home thoughts

Today while I am sitting in the train by the window traveling back to home after a year almost for diwali few thoughts randomly hit me that generally I never get time to ponder on or think about…

This Covid-19 lockdown and WFH definitely tested me enough making me stay alone away from the family for almost a year and in such a way that I can’t feel the excitement of going home for Diwali at all that kept me lit up for many weeks before going back home… My mind is all filled with how to reach home safely since I am traveling through the train…

I was fine with staying away from home for Diwali till two weeks back and suddenly something changed. I felt the urge of going home, not wanting to experience staying alone on festival day thinking about all the good old years that I enjoyed with family in Diwali.

This is when some part of me started convincing me to go back home as it is not worth it to stay away from the family for any reason on the main festive season. I realized I deserve to feel happy and contented at this time of the year… Without allowing myself to have any second thoughts on this, I followed my heart booked the ticket and here I am writing this blog in the train.

I realized this part of me that convinced me to chuck everything and do what I want always pops up when the limit of tolerance is reached and something becomes unbearable to feel and survive it… This part of me is my personal favorite that never allows me to give up and directs me to a way that makes it easy to make up….

Thursday thoughts…05/11/2020

How hard have you found yourself pushing you to hang on and not let go…

Even though it feels so convincing when we listen to motivational speakers decorating and presenting before you their lovely and inspiring story but have you ever wondered if it is what is keeping you going. Is their speech making you keep holding on when you reach the edge where you find things difficult to hold on and can’t yourself making through on the other side… It may have inspired you, motivated you or guided you for that time being but your own mind is the one that makes you remember it, recollect it and remind you to follow it. Nothing is important till the time your mind intervene and asks you to do something. That is why maybe we are always told since we are little that put all of your heart and mind in whatever you plan to do and doing this will actually lead you to make it happen…

What I intend to mean here is that it is not people around you that make something good or bad happen to you, I believe its all build up in your mind…basically its you who decide how to face and fight whatever hindrance that may come your way… However bad you want someone to hold you back when you need, there will come a time for sure when you would never find them around and this feeling of emptiness will make you fall for a thought that you can go back to where you started by giving up today… You tend to forget how you reached this long way here… You give yourself less of a credit to help you hold on to you when nobody is there by you side in your weakest points in life…

You have your own little ways to inspire and motivate yourself every morning when you wake up. Always cherish yourself, love yourself more than you are capable of loving anyone else in life because you deserve nothing less than this care and affection for yourself… This is what I have believed in and have been taught by life…

Faith

He tests your belief in him in toughest of times and gives you every possible reason to disbelieve his presence.

He makes you question every believe that you nurtured since your childhood about life, about people.

He makes everything around you go upside down just to mess your mind up so that you build yourself up into a better version of you from your broken pieces.

He makes you believe you can’t make it through so as to strengthen your heart to encourage you to do so.

He always have your back but he never makes you realize it since he always leads you to your own instincts to motivate yourself, strengthen your willpower and make you self confident.

He always put you in situations that make you believe that you can trust yourself, love yourself and you are the most dependable person for you.

He teaches you that you can count on yourself more than you are capable to count on everyone around you.

He is always by your side no matter what but keeps you in the impression that you are all alone.

He has his own beautiful ways to paint lovely miracles in your life which you might have never seen or expected to happen with you. This is when you look back you realize how he’s always been looking after you, showing you the path in the darkness through the instincts of your heart and corrects you when you choose a wrong path as a warning instincts from your brain.

He indeed has his own little ways to keep you safe and happy which you are not always capable to gauge…

A ray of hope…

Have you ever faced a situation that I have mentioned below—-

There comes a phase in life when all you can think is negative. Every thought that you have is negative. Whatever your loved ones advice to you it kind of becomes words going to the deaf ears.

You some how magically get the ability to find faults or negativity all around you, surrounding you like the atmosphere and you top that making your life miserable yourself thinking about it constantly day in and day out.

Then you have a terrible urge to give up everything you’ve been working so hard for all these years and run away just few moment of peace and solitude… Is such peaceful moments worth you leaving back everything you’ve invested your heart and soul for achieving….

You kind of start losing faith and believe that things might get better than this and you will survive it. You tend to forget like every phase in life this will also not be permanent, it will pass, it always does, isn’t it?

In such phase if you are confronted with failure and rejection, it seems to be the end of the world, it seems to you that you are stuck in the middle of the problems having no way out of it. What you tend to forget is that you always have a way out, it’s just that since your vision is compromised with your negative thoughts, you can’t see across what good is awaiting for you…

There will be people around you who might have more difficult issues in life but you won’t appreciate you being in a better position than them in every aspect. Again magically you’ll end up concluding that your grievances and problems are the most difficult one’s and you’d convince yourself with it and believe it blindly.

You find everything stopping you from giving up things isn’t sign from the universe to hold on but it’s kind of bondage for you.

Then when you are on the verge of breakdown, you suddenly find a ray of hope when you never expected to see and restore your believe of something good happening in life after such a long waiting… what an inexplicable and amazing feeling is it that makes you so happy just by thinking of the possibilities that situations might change for better… You do cling to this hope no matter what and overcome your difficulties…

This is how the universe works isn’t it, it always indicate a way out when you are not capable to tolerate any more and change your life for good, teaching you how to be assertive and dwell positive thoughts in your mind again after you’ve almost lost yourself…

This is when you realize and appreciate how worthy it was for you to hang on, tolerate and move on convincing yourself everyday that this testing phase of life will pass with a constant urge of giving up ( since its the easiest and the most worthless thing you could do to yourself)!

Well this is what exactly happened today, it seems…